morning weight: xxx lbs (no loss)
Happy 4th. Hoo-rah! I used to love this holiday but now the fireworks freak Sena out into a anxiety attack, so I hope it rains like hell tonight. Doesn't seem likely, but there might be a thunderstorm which is just as bad for her. Despite the 70 degree weather, I will have the fans and ACs blasting and the TV blaring to drown out as much of the bad noise as possible. She's got enough stress being unable to walk and being on pain meds, she doesn't need anything added to it. Which is another reason I didn't invite anyone over. I just don't want to entertain.
I don't know why there's no loss today. It is my 1st stall perhaps, they speak of these stalls in the 3rd week (check) or when someone has too much beef (check) or when someone hasn't drunk enough water (that's definitely not me). Trying not to dwell on it but it really bums me out. And I'm having steaks with the dogs today so that's more beef. I need a break from chicken.
It's just the kind of day when you want to go and eat nachos at Moe's or a bowl full of butter popcorn while watching a movie. It's the kind of day when you feel all alone as an addict and you think reaching out to talk to someone about it just won't help. It's the kind of day that is more dangerous than the others because you have some idle time on your hands and you have those cravings that have been calling you for days and you don't have adequate food to put into your mouth instead and you know you have to go to the grocery store, yet you secretly hope they close early for the holiday before you can get there and then you'll be forced to order Chinese food.
Umhm. Pathetic line of thought. Self-sabotage.
Instead, what will we do? Think! Use that brain of yours instead of that stomach and that lousy emotional heart. Think!
1. Eat before shopping is a must.
2. Shop immediately.
3. Buy lots of carb-lite alternatives.
4. Watch movie.
5. Work on short story.
6. Play violent video game and pretend the bad guys are fat carbs attacking you.
7. Take Chad for a walk (and don't feel guilty that Sena cannot go).
I wish I was the type of person who felt cleaning the house was a good thing to do when stressed, but I can't for the life of me muster up an ounce of care about that.
We've got a jumper here in progress; send backup!
Losing Weight; Finding Men
"Never make someone a priority in your life when you are just their option."