Losing Weight; Finding Men

"Never make someone a priority in your life when you are just their option."

Sunday, January 31, 2010

February Plan

Review of First 30 Days

  • Take no work home from office. 85% success
  • Dinner & Communications 6-8 PM (no later than 8 PM) 5% success
  • Meditation (between the hours of) 8-10 PM 10% success
  • Nordictrack (between the hours of) 8-10 PM while watching TV or reading FAIL
  • Bed 11 PM Sun-Thurs 20% success
  • Contact the hypnotherapists. success
  • Search for used treadmill. success
  • Look for ways to cut monthly budget. FAIL
  • Stick to the Off/On lists below; assess after 30 days: February 2. FAIL

Absolute Failure on the On/Off Lists about 20 days into it. Just stopped caring about what I was eating and trying to lose weight. Oddly, about the same time I finally had sex again. In theory, nice idea to feel so good that you don't care about what you eat. In reality, doesn't work for me as I quickly gained massive poundage. I can't deny the stress at work of interviewing 6 candidates for 2 jobs was likely a major factor as well.

And in the past few days in particular, I've gone out of my way to eat whatever I want. Five Guys Burgers & Fries? Yes. Taco Bell? Yes. Pizza? Yes. Coldstone? Yes.

Why did I do that? Well, addicts will rationalize their behavior on anything. But this was a very conscious effort. I felt the approach was similar to that of an addict entering rehab, when they have a drink or a hit of narcotics on the way to their detox. Like one last binge? Or a prisoner's last meal request before they face the death penalty.

I did it as a reminder, that deciding what you eat MUST be a conscious effort. Interestingly, after eating what I thought I wanted, it was obvious it wasn't what I wanted. And also, if I can drive 20 minutes and two towns over for some sugar, cream, milk and ice blended into the best shake in the world, then I can damn well WANT to lose weight enough to put in the EFFORT.

So, after several weeks of research about what to do and where to go next in my "once and for all" weight loss efforts, I have designed a method that seems right for me and I'm going to describe it below. I'm excited about it which is key.

But first, I thought it might be worth noting what products or programs I considered that I am not going to be trying for one reason or another. If you message me with a response address and want to know why, I'll tell you.
I don't want to unduly influence someone by telling you why those avenues are not right for me, especially if one or more of them might be right for you. But I would urge everyone to conduct research. There's really no excuse not to arm yourself with knowledge these days. Independent reviews are all out here on the internet for us all to determine what is best for our individual needs.

Ideally, my choice would be either Medifast or Optifast, because they're medically supervised clinics.

But I can't. The minimum cost would be about $1,200 for 12 weeks. (Hmm, no wonder so many people are overweight?) So, instead I researched as much of the supplement products of those medically approved programs as I could and I've purchased the products or equivalents. I'm incorporating what I can into my own "TrueHeartFast" program.

In addition to the no refined carbs, eating natural (shopping just on the outside of the grocery aisles), and eating as clean as I can, I also will be incorporating the following items and efforts which are a direct reference from those above medical plans.
  • Vitamin D-3
  • Calcium
  • Magnesium
  • Liquid Hoodia 500MG
  • Omega 3s 1000 MG
  • Daily Multivitamin
  • Whey Protein (20 grams of protein and only 3 carbs)
  • Liponic Colon Cleanse* (ingredient details at the end of this post for those curious)
I can already imagine the questions and comments, so please don't hesitate. If you comment, I know you care and have something to say.

"Hoodia? That stuff doesn't work."
Well, you're right I think the low-grade crap that's out there doesn't work, but I think the high-grade pure plant I found does and those medical plans above include it. I used a lot of independent reviews to make my decision.

"Do you think you're that nutritionally out of whack to need those extras?"
Yes. Absolutely. We're not just talking about a body that has to lose 10 or 15 lbs and has a slice of cake when it shouldn't. We're talking about a body that prefers carbohydrates 24/7. It is broken and misfiring on all levels. I know myself. No one else does. And if I am taking something I don't need, my body will just excrete it.

In addition to the supplements just listed above, I'll be starting hypnotherapy which I believe will help me with the sub-conscious sabotage I have done to myself since childhood.

And the above admissions right there should cause any potential dates to give up interest in me if they've read this. Yes, one of the first rules out there about dating is to stay away from addicts. And addicts shouldn't date (I didn't say shouldn't have sex but the programs do). Oh well. I have to heal myself first anyway.

In addition, I'll be picking up a used treadmill (with the help of a dolly, a rental truck, and Harry Pottypants' help) next Saturday, and it will replace the ski machine in the living in front of the TV.

And last but not least...I've cleaned house of what I've identified as negative triggers.

For the past 6 months, there's been a bikini-clad woman showing up in my mailbox. Compliments of my dear friend Sweden who meant well. But this is just a great example of...how sick am I? The sad truth? I wasn't able to even crack open a page of one of the magazines, despite headlines like "I've lost 116 lbs and you can too." I can't get passed the covers. Covers of women who may not look like any of us thanks to airbrushing we all realize, but who certainly look a hell of a lot more like most of you than they ever will of me. Ever. EVER. Even 100 lbs less, I'll never look like that. And I don't want to be reminded. So, no more self-sabotage. I gave the magazines away.

I also put all the clothes that don't fit into the left side of the closet. They'll be there when I lose, but not a moment before.

I've put the scale and the mirror away for now. They'll be there when I *FEEL* better, rather than using them to decide how I feel.

Positive, positive, positive.

Lastly, I'm placing an unusual but necessary restriction on eating: no eating out for 30 days. I will control all my eating by what I bring into this house or bring to work. I have proven I'm good with that.

And if on some bizarre chance a guy wants to meet me in this crazy month of commercialized romance, it'll have to be a non-eating meeting. I wouldn't rule out drinks but again, that's a slippery slope and alcohol is deadly to a weightloss plan.

P.S. The supplements will arrive in a few days. I'll be sure to document my experience with them.


*Colon Cleanse Tablet Supplement Details
Consisting of synergistic ingredients to enable proper lymph drainage, strong liver function and assimilation of nutrients into the bloodstream. These lipotropic ingredients (agents) emulsify as well as transport fat to be converted into energy. They also help to deactivate and expel harmful toxic substances from the body. This ensures that fat is shed from the body in a safe and natural manner.

Within this group there are four major lipotropic agents. The first ingredient/agent Inositol Hexaphosphate, (not your ordinary called Inositol Hexaphosphate, is a lipotropic agent that metabolizes fats and cholesterol. It also aids in transporting fat in the circulatory system along with the expulsion of excess fat within the blood. Inositol Hexaphosphate is also known to combat cancer and lower cholesterol levels.

The second major lipotropic ingredient, DL-Methionine, is a lipotropic amino acid which not only reduces fat and cholesterol levels, but also increases dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. It also acts as an antidepressant. Moreover, dl-methionine has been found to be as effective, or better than most prescription antidepressant medications.

The third major lipotropic ingredient, Alpha Lipoic Acid, promotes fat loss by preferentially shunting glucose to muscle cells away from fat cells. ALA is also a coenzyme in the metabolic pathway that generates energy in the body. It also removes heavy toxic metals and protects the liver against many toxins.

The fourth major lipotropic ingredient, Chromium picolinate, is a rare nutrient of which 98% of the American population do not get enough in their diet. A diet high in sugar can decrease the body's store of chromium. Many physicians use chromium picolinate to treat Type II diabetes or insulin resistance. In addition, this unique lipotropic slenderizing pill makes you much less susceptible to diseases such as:

* cancer
* fatty liver
* sluggish lymph drainage
* diabetes and insulin fluctuations

The overall cleansing and strengthening of the hepatic and lymphatic systems help your liver to function at optimal levels, making it easy to focus energy on losing weight rather than fighting to prevent diseases. Free from the chemical trappings of other leading brands of lipotropics, our all-natural formulation blows the competition out of the water in terms of potency, efficiency, and fat-expulsion capability. Our made-from-scratch formula contains:

* No Yeast
* No Starch
* No Chemical Additives
* No Artificial Dyes
* No Salt
* No Sugar

Sunday, January 24, 2010

My New Snack

My family and childhood friends are definitely going to laugh out loud, but I've discover how much I like soybeans.

I'm sorry, the chic term is edamame.

Per 100 grams....

Calories 125.0
Protein 12.1
Carbohydrates 13.1
Fat 3.6
Ash 1.7
Calcium 9.3
Phosphorus 180.0
Iron 2.7
Sodium 5.0
Vitamin A 130.0
Vitamin U1 0.31
Vitamin C 40.0

Had them at dinner with Geeky Lay. Wow they were fabulously tasty.

Too many carbs really...but....if I have to snack on something, better it be this than a loaf of bread.

Taken from Wiki:
"Edamame also contains protein, which further helps stabilize blood sugar, and omega-3 fatty acids. In some circumstances, this can also result in a laxative effect. This is a popular traditional remedy in regions of Asia, where it is known as Bhatamas.

Edamame beans contain higher levels of abscisic acid (a plant hormone), sucrose, protein than other types of soybean. They also contain a high source of dietary fiber, iron and calcium."

Well, I hope I don't eat too many and have that laxative effect.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Fickle Sagittarian

"Don't you know before you choose your wish

You'd better think first
'Cause with every wish there comes a curse"
-With Every Wish, Springsteen

OK it has only been two nights (out of two weeks) with my FwB Geeky Lay. But I'm having some issues, and I'm trying to sort them out of my head onto the open space here.

  • He doesn't mind the animals. He pets them and offers them Reiki.
  • He doesn't mind my weight. He pays great attention to me between the sheets and in public.
  • He doesn't mind that my back causes me to lie flat sometimes. He offers me Reiki.
  • He's 29 in bed.
  • He opens doors.
  • He insists on paying.
  • He knows how to kiss.
  • He's 29 in bed. (Yes, I think it counts twice.)


  • He only wants to get together on Fridays. (He *ahem* games on Saturday and Sundays. He's rehearsing a theater play the rest of the week and taking four courses during the day.)
  • He talks about the things he has done or the things he can do with an air of superiority that often makes me want to cringe and/or roll my eyes but I've stopped myself.
  • He's 50 when he's dining out.
  • He's 75 when he's driving.
  • He rents a studio apartment from his parents.
  • He lives 49 miles away.

Well, clearly the pros outweigh the cons. And realistically, some of the cons are also pros, and some of the cons aren't really cons at all. I'm not looking to marry the guy.

So what in the bloody hell is wrong with me? Why am I bored when the sex isn't happening?

Has it been so long since someone has been nice to me that I don't know how to handle it?

Has it been so long since I've had a fairly functional interaction with a man (Honestly? L was never fairly functional, so we're talking way way 6-7 years back when I lived with Scottish DJ.) that I no longer want a fairly functional interaction with a man?

Earlier today I actually thought to myself, "Right well, that's that. I'm done. Next."

And I had to pull back and re-think, "Are you nuts, out of your damn tree, you fickle, flighty Sagittarian?! Do you not remember ANY of the last 13 dry painful months you spent keening for a partner?!"

Can someone please slap me? Thank you.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Early Bird Special

I keep wanting to play catch up, but I never seem to have enough time. Maybe this weekend. You know you're busy when you don't even have time to write for yourself.

But I have a semi-social life now, so I can't complain too much.

Tonight my Geeky Lay (formerly East Strasburg - had to change it, spelling is wrong) wants to have Japanese food at 5 pm. See, I told you he's like a 29-year old senior citizen. Can you say Early Bird Special? Then he wants to play more pool, because beating me 6 games wasn't enough? I don't really mind, because all I'm thinking about is the sex. Fine by me, as long as we're in bed by 9, maybe I'll have some energy to do something. Friends with benefits, people, and I'm focusing on the benefits.

Speaking of benefits...have you donated to Haiti Relief?

The Help for Haiti Now concert is tonight. I love to see how organized everyone can be around this frightening natural disaster. I will tape it and love to see me some Bruce, some Brad, some others. There but for the grace of god go us...no one chooses to live on a fault line in a poor country. Yet, I can't help but wonder why couldn't this type of fund raising exist for New Orleans, or hell why couldn't it exist when Haiti was "just" another extremely poor country? I'm amazed at the money figures raised and hoping it reaches the people who so desperately need it.

I support the local shelters here and I support the wolf sanctuary and I support the continual rebuilding of the 9th ward in New Orleans. So, Haiti, hopefully you really do have those millions of dollars pouring in to help you. I gave what money I could, not to ease any guilt over living in the northeast corridor of the United States, but because I knew no other way to help. If I were a doctor, I would go. If I were an animal rescuer, I would go with my special sniffing dog. If I were unemployed and someone could get me there for free, I would go to do something helpful with my time. But I am none of these things, so I gave my spare funds and I hope it helps.

Just another hard-working, overweight, privileged soul living with a job, a cat, two dogs, and a geeky lay in Jersey in the year 2010. Believe me, I'm not knocking it.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

8-Ball, Corner Pocket

I had a whirlwind weekend. The Light of Day benefit show turned into a Springsteen fest. I couldn't believe it even as I stood about 20 feet away from him. Definitely a shot of adrenaline for me. Music is my lifeblood, and Bruce is like a speedball.

I really didn't even have much chance to process what happened with East Strasburg until Sunday. But I've definitely beguiled him with my Sagittarian sexiness. He's already asked to spend this coming Friday night together. I have said yes. How nice it feels to have a choice.

There are some things about him that bore me I'm afraid, but I'm not looking to spend forever with him. He's a geek and an elitist. He's an intellectual of the highest degree. He's able to simultaneously play classical guitar, sing rock and roll, calculate the angles on a billiard table, and lecture on geology. He has 3 degrees and he's going for a 4th degree. He's a gamer and collector of rare guitars. He has his own pool cue and quite likely his own tux. He's a jack of all trades. I could go on and on.

Why isn't he in a relationship or looking for one? Good question. He doesn't want to devote the time to one. He's too busy starring in local theater and running RPGs for others. If he wasn't also in tune with his emotions, it'd be a lost cause for me. But he is a passionate soul, and that makes it a solid experience for me. Whatever he does, he does to the point of perfection. So, naturally, I was quite pleased with my sleepover partner's perfectionism in some particular areas.

I am having trouble with exercise, as in it has literally halted. For the past week, I have thrown myself into my job, because I need to fill two open positions on my team. I have never been so emotional invested. If I hire the right people, not only does it ease my own workload, but I look like I know what I'm doing in the eyes of my superiors.

But oh god is it ever exhausting. The right questions, looking for clues that they're lying (Come on who doesn't embellish aka SELL themselves in an interview?), and then they have to pass a test I made that I probably couldn't pass if it had been given to me.

I need to get on track and get thin. I have a very important wedding to attend in California in October!

(And...Craig Ferguson, you better be taping while I'm out there because I'm making a trip to LA too!)

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Rain On Me

The colors are sharper.
My smile is wider.
The air is cleaner
and the sun is brighter.
My eyes are shining
and my laughter is lighter.

Image above created and owned by h.koppdelaney

No, I'm not in love in with East Strasburg, and he's even a little too intellectual for me, but between the sheets, the boy has all the right moves for my grooves at the moment. And at the moment, that is more than fine with me.

Being released from my way too long (partly self-imposed, partly bad luck) sexual prison feels A.M.A.Z.I.N.G.

I feel like singing. That sort of overwhelming sense of calling out at the top of your lungs, semi-operatic, Sound of Music, semi-country whoop-howlin.

"...Hard times come, Hard times go..."

The timing is appropriate, because I'm going to the Light of Day benefit show tonight in Asbury Park where there will be more music than I could imagine in my head. The sound will engulf me and I will feel beautifully insulated. Almost like the perfect day-after cuddle session.

The 13-month drought has finally ended.

Let it rain, rain on me.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Progress Update

How Is the 30-Day To-Do List Coming Along?
  • Contact the hypnotherapists.
Have contracted with a hypnotherapist via my massage therapist. She's someone I feel comfortable with, and she took a lengthy history of life and she is customizing a program for me. The bad news is that it won't be ready until February. The good news is I finally made some progress here.

  • Search for used treadmill.
The good news: THERE ARE SO MANY!
The bad news: Most models will not fit into my SUV and cannot be lifted by one person.

  • Look for ways to cut monthly budget.
Hmmm. Yeah. Still looking.

  • Stick to the Off/On lists below; assess after 30 days: February 2.
I've lost 8 of the 22 lbs I've gained since October.
I have stuck to my lists - except I had 3 dates. No alcohol, but carbs.

Other News

I am not enjoying the nordictrack. It has a jerking motion, not a fluid motion. I will try to grease the flywheel to see if that helps.

I have a 2nd date on Friday night with East Strasburg. Billiards and then who knows. Perhaps a sleepover pajama party. Yes, I'm 12.

Sunday's 3rd date, the filmmaker, has emailed me asking when I'm free to get together. I have to do the right thing; I have to treat him the way I would want to be treated. Not strung along.

Oh, to the anonymous commenters I'm accumulating lately on older posts...I really don't care if you don't want to reveal who you are, whether you know me in real life or not, but please remember, I'm writing for myself, not for an audience or to gain readership or popularity.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Anyone's Guess

I don't really understand the laws of attraction. How long have I been pining away to be kissed? Months and months. And I finally was....and....well, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Foremost lesson learned: NEVER triple-book 1st meets in one weekend. I'm exhausted. I feel like I have politician cheeks from smiling so much. I was certain one would have canceled, but I won't hedge that bet again.

Saturday Lunch Date: This guy needs a name because I'm 98% sure I'll be seeing him again. He's a walking book of knowledge on everything from which herbal remedies work for which ailments to the first song ever recorded by Buddy Guy to public speaking on geology to reiki to gemstone healing to canasta with his grandmother and organizing community games for young adults.

He's 29 year old geek going on 50 and admitted that if he could make a living out of obtaining college degrees then that is what he will do. As for gentlemanly, he opened doors, he was complimentary and he made good eye contact despite his admission that I made him somewhat nervous with my beautiful eyes. He didn't pay because I ordered first and had my money out before he even realized it. I didn't care. This really isn't going to be that type of relationship and as a full-time student, he's strapped for funds. As long as he doesn't ever expect me to pay for him as well, we'll be fine.

I would say I'm fairly attracted to him. He has lovely blue eyes and red hair with a full beard and mustache that without he would probably look like he's 12. He's 5'9 which is fine, my cutoff is my own height 5'7. We had good easy conversation. When we parted I said I was off to buy new undergarments and he said "Oohh, nice, I like a woman in lingerie." I told him that was duly noted. He didn't try to kiss me, but within hours of leaving one another he'd messaged me asking if we could get together again soon, as in next week or weekend. I said sounds like fun. I think we'll call him East Strasburg.

Saturday Night Movie Date: Very funny guy, age 38, dark hair, glasses. But, very small in stature. I felt like a giant. He says he's 5'9 but he is more like 5'6 because I was taller than he was. And just small framed. He has a quick wit sense of humor that I can see enjoying every time. Very good banter between us. Jon Stewart type of humor and delivery of jokes. He has a sad story of a 16-year marriage to his first love and only lover that has left him more than a little gun shy. I think he might be damaged beyond repair but he is well aware. He's just looking for friends. I told him, perfect, we can definitely be friends.

As I looked at him, I wasn't turned on or turned off. Because he was so shut down in some senses, he wasn't giving off any romantic vibe whatsoever. He was giving off more of a brotherly vibe. I couldn't believe he's only ever had sex with one woman. I think we'll call him my Jersey Male Friend (JMF), if we do indeed hang out more. I hope we do. I could use some friends in Jersey.

Enjoyed Leap Year by the way. And the accent of Matthew Goode against the backdrop of Ireland. Need to see what more he's done and bring it to my netflix inbox immediately.

Sunday Lunch Date: We all knew I had reservations about Filmmaker man in his inability to communicate by phone or email well. But I still went because the field is already narrowed down by "must love dogs and must not mind weight" so if they get past those two barriers, I think they deserve a chance. I wanted this date to go well. I wanted to start dating a man from MA who makes films, lives in his father's old house that has a pond and woods and a perfect place for dogs.

The man I met is struggling. He's 40 and he has to live with his brother for financial reasons. Yet he's living his dream of trying to make films. But he's so incredibly boring. I asked every question imaginable, I tried to pick his brain about his industry, his work process, sharing my writing process to see if we could compare. I asked him what he does for fun, he didn't have an answer. I asked him what did for New Year's, he didn't have an answer. I asked him if he ever comes into NYC, he said (and I quote) "Not since they cleaned it up." And went on to say a group of guys would go to Times Square for porn. I asked if he's traveled. Not out of the country. I know, not everyone can afford it. He's spent a huge amount of money on his movie, his baby, that he's trying to shop around buyers. I admire that he's chasing his dream. God knows I wish I could be chasing mine.

But when it comes right down to it, I did not feel attracted to him, to who he is, despite blond hair, blue eyes. His brother on the other hand, of course, I found very attractive. (No, he wasn't there, but he stars in the Filmmaker's films.) Filmmaker man did pay, insisted on paying in fact. He had nice manners, opening doors, helping me hang my coat, but didn't ask any questions of interest about me or my life.

I did thank him with a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. And he came back with a bear hug that wouldn't let go and then landed a huge kiss on my lips, pulling away and then coming in again with lips open as I started to say something and hands on my face to keep my face still. Bam, the tongue. I thought I would gag, it was so unexpected. He didn't even wait to see if I was responding, he just bulldozed right in. I had to stand my ground, lips closed and push against him slightly.

Luckily the static of the dry air gave us both a shock and I shivered from the cold and said I should go while he said "That shock is just because I'm such a good kisser." Ummm, yeah. Not so much. He asked what I was doing for the "long weekend" and I couldn't understand. Oh MLK Day, right, we don't have that off. Did I mention I work for Ze Zermans. Yeah so, I expect he'll pursue me and I'll have to tell him I'm not interested.

So.......why does this all feel so wrong? What the hell is up with the laws of attraction? Why am I not attracted to this man and his obvious interest in me? Hell if I know.


Friday, January 8, 2010

A 3-Date Weekend

Alrighty, I need some words of encouragement. Of course, they could all cancel, but....as of this moment, I have scored 3 dates this weekend. 2 OKStupid and 1 eHarmless. Would you like a little preview? OK.

Saturday lunch: He's 29 (rawr) and an accomplished musician who has sat in with Slash and Eric Clapton on some jam sessions. He's got the photos to prove it, unless he's a photoshop expert. We're both thinking strictly FwB here. I'm good with that thought right now, because people, it has been a flipping 13 months. This Sag is dying.

Saturday night: He's 37 and also a musician. Not as much of a name-dropper as the 29 year old, but still, he's composing and he's open-miking it often. His day job involves IT. He asked me to go see Leap Year. Of course I said yes, and not just because of the storyline (but I love the idea of that movie's storyline).

Sunday lunch: He's 40 and a filmmaker. He was in LA for a few years, and namedropped that he'd worked with Brad Pitt before the Thelma & Louise big break. He's hired agents who are shopping his film around this year on the festival circuit. Entourage anyone? He's in MA and we're meeting halfway in CT. He was willing to drive all the way here, but I didn't like the pressure that made me feel. We are only meeting for lunch, and I have a feeling we're not going to click because he made a comment about me being able to "judge for myself if he's self-centered" when we meet. Clearly a past issue for him because I've never thought nor indicated that to him in any way. He also said he likes long-distance relationships because he's fine with only seeing someone once a week. Not exactly what I'm looking for.

Goodness, looks like I have to do some laundry tonight.

In the wings....

A dog-loving, world traveling design engineer in Wisconsin.

An adrenaline junkie in New York.

So far, I would say TwentyTen is pretty entertaining so far. Stay tuned to see if there's any substance.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Exercise and Jake TV

Well there it is....Le Olde Nordictrack. Never had a heart rate monitor before when I used this so I had no idea what type of workout I might have when I climbed on board last night while watching (Yes, this season I will watch.) The Bachelor. I'm only watching for Jake who seems so genuine and sincere, he's surely a train wreck about to unfold. It is a show about love that focuses nearly 80% on sex appeal. Gotta love the message we're sending.

Anyway, to the exercise. Managed to get my heart rate up to 165 at times, but my average was still low, 126. Still, I was surprised. And after EXTENSIVE stretching last night, I am proud to say that I can walk just fine this morning and in fact, my back hurts LESS today than it did yesterday morning.

The one glitch about my schedule I was hoping to stick to is that I put eating dinner before working out. That's not a good idea and that's not really going to happen. So I'm going to have to adjust, perhaps with larger lunches and lighter dinners, after exercising. The whole point of exercising at night is to combat the "stuff your face while watching tv" syndrome. If I'm watching tv, I need to be on the nordictrack at least half of the time.

Well, I'll work the kinks out somehow. I have to. Since mid-October, I've gained 22 lbs. That's just 3 months. That's ridiculous. I fought so hard all last year for this?! Talk about being pissed off at myself. Now I just hope it doesn't take me an entire year to lose 22 lbs. The yo-yo effect is not a good thing, getting slower with each year a woman gets older.

2010 with a Twist

30-Day To-Do List

  • Contact the hypnotherapists.
  • Search for used treadmill.
  • Look for ways to cut monthly budget.
  • Stick to the Off/On lists below; assess after 30 days: February 2.

My Off List
  • pizza
  • bread (EXCEPT Ezekiel sprout bread and vitatop muffintops for fiber/protein)
  • sugar
  • chocolate
  • ice cream
  • butter
  • milk (except Hood Calorie Countdown FatFree Diary Beverage)
  • cheese
  • potatoes
  • rice
  • pasta
  • fruit (except listed below)
  • alcohol (exception: 1st dates, one drink allowed)

My On List
  • vegetables of all kinds (except potatoes)
  • unsweetened cranberry juice
  • blueberries
  • smart balance peanut butter
  • walnuts
  • lean chicken breast
  • lean turkey breast
  • buffalo red meat (once a week)
  • 64 ounces of water (at a minimum)
  • my supplements
  • lo-carb whey protein powder
  • miracle noodles (zero cals, 100% fiber, made of yam flour)
  • popcorn (homemade popped, once a week, movie night)

New Dos of the 2010 Equation
  • Take no work home from office.
  • Dinner & Communications 6-8 PM (no later than 8 PM)
  • Meditation (between the hours of) 8-10 PM
  • Nordictrack (between the hours of) 8-10 PM while watching TV or reading
  • Bed 11 PM Sun-Thurs

Friday, January 1, 2010

A Wonderful Resolution

Yes, you have to right-click on it to read it, sorry (blogger sucks sometimes).

Yes, you can save as, copy it and keep it. Credit is given for the poem to Douglas Pagels. The images are my very own orchids.

Happy New Year Everyone.

you're like butter to me

Just a Lovable Party Girl

Just a Lovable Party Girl
Sagittarius is born to travel the world and move upwards and outwards. Naturally gregarious, they love the idea of meeting different people and understanding foreign cultures. There is also a desire to broaden the mind too, with the possibility of many Sagittarians being lifelong students. Their outlook is generally optimistic and there is a distinct lack of concern over the smaller, practical details. A great sense of humor and a lack of petty mindedness are Sagittarian qualities too. Sagittarius is open -- open-minded, open-hearted and generous, up to a point. They like to get value and will not be quite so impulsive with their cash but they do have a natural ability to get on with people from many varied walks of life. They have an innate sense of wanting to help others and give them a hand up the ladder and can be wonderful and exciting companions. Expect an honest answer when you ask a question and maybe some long philosophic discussions into the night. Jovial, optimistic, versatile, open-minded, philosophical, sincere, frank, visionary.