Losing Weight; Finding Men

"Never make someone a priority in your life when you are just their option."

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Don't Call Me Macedonia

I've dated a restaurant manager (Mr Listener, who doesn't deserve linkage anymore), and now I've been on a date with a restaurant owner. A restaurant owner who chose to meet "just for coffee" at a diner at 9:30 on a Tuesday.

Still, I was hopeful. After all, you know, the internationals like me.

And this guy was no exception. He pursued me hard for a week. Oh my, such an investment in time. This guy was SO eager to meet me. From Macedonia, with Hungarian, Croatian, and Italian ancestry. Speaks 6 languages. Has a business degree. Nice, dark, and handsome. Warm eyes, clean look. No comparison to Borat. All good.

He is all about work. And status. Has a house here in Jersey. Has a house and boat in Macedonia. Divorced with grown kids who prefer to live with him because of the house. Works so much and so hard he can't say what he does for fun because he rarely has time for it. Plays basketball with his son. Enjoys concerts but rarely gets to go. Works major holidays.

You get the picture. At more than one moment as we sat at the diner picking at pieces of pie, I felt I was listening to my ex husband talk about how if you want nice things you have to work hard for them, and he was proud of all he's accomplished since coming to the states 21 years ago. He should be.

But by the 5th time he told me that I have beautiful eyes and hair, I got the feeling I knew what he had time for. It was confirmed when we got to the cars and he gave me a hug that had an extra special package down below.

He told me he was a very passionate man. I told him that was nice. He said he was looking for a passionate woman. I told him I was passionate, just not on the first date.

He then said, "I'm not looking for sex right away. I'm just looking for someone to understand me. I may not have a lot of time now, but in 2 years perhaps I won't have to work at all anymore...."

Then he grabbed my waist and shook it a little and said, "Who knows, in 2 years, I sell the restaurant and the house, you lose a little weight, and together we can go live in Macedonia."

I blinked. I replayed the words. And I repeated, as my profile clearly states: "I need someone who will accept me just as I am."

He stood there smiling at me. "Oh I know. I know you have dogs too. That's OK. I love dogs. I had a white shepherd once."

I stopped hearing his words. "OK I'm going to go now. Ciao."

"I'll call you Thursday."

Whatever.

I'm home in time for Craig Ferguson. Who has lost weight. Great, isn't that just great.



10 comments:

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

My heart sank reading that. I remember having similar experiences when I was single. I suggest you lose his number....you deserve much, much better.

Ice Queen said...

WTF?!?! That guy sounded like a freak! Gross!

A True Heart Girl in Jersey said...

And he texted me today, "You made me so horny last night." And I replied, "Yes, I have that effect on men. That's my superpower." Haha. What a laugh. Gotta laugh people, gotta laugh.

S. said...

Jeez. I think I've been on that exact same date...except he was an economics professor from Kenya. And his text messages quickly and bizarrely turned to, "I am in love with you," when I stopped responding.

Graciela said...

Okay, woman, are you sure you're not funnin' us? All your dates are starting to sound like a work of fiction. You are a writer, after all. Ha ha.

Yep, this one ranked right up at the top of the stranger than fiction category.

Carolina Girl said...

I would have kicked him right in his "special package." UGH What a TOOL. Wow. Welcome to the dating world, it's so fun, is it not?

Have a relaxing day working on that novel! :)

Sarah said...

Unbelievable! I hope the pie was good.

Soxy Deb said...

Ugh! How you didn't throw up on him is beyond me. Disgusting.

How did your breakfast date go Monday? I may have missed you saying, but I don't think so.

Enjoy the rest of your vaca!

Maruska Morena said...

Damn and I was hoping one of us would have a successful dating story.

And nothing wrong with you exactly as you are obviously if you got him that worked up. :) He's just a dumbass.

MissMelisaMae said...

Wow! What a sleaze! I'm so sorry that you had to indure an evening with that prick. And the nerve of him mentioning weight!?! What happened to people having manners? Reading your post, I wanted to be there and smack the everloving shit out of this guy for you. So, it's settled, your next date...I'm coming with you! XOXO

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Just a Lovable Party Girl

Just a Lovable Party Girl
Sagittarius is born to travel the world and move upwards and outwards. Naturally gregarious, they love the idea of meeting different people and understanding foreign cultures. There is also a desire to broaden the mind too, with the possibility of many Sagittarians being lifelong students. Their outlook is generally optimistic and there is a distinct lack of concern over the smaller, practical details. A great sense of humor and a lack of petty mindedness are Sagittarian qualities too. Sagittarius is open -- open-minded, open-hearted and generous, up to a point. They like to get value and will not be quite so impulsive with their cash but they do have a natural ability to get on with people from many varied walks of life. They have an innate sense of wanting to help others and give them a hand up the ladder and can be wonderful and exciting companions. Expect an honest answer when you ask a question and maybe some long philosophic discussions into the night. Jovial, optimistic, versatile, open-minded, philosophical, sincere, frank, visionary.