morning weight: 265 lbs
So the whole slipped discs disaster has cost me 10 lbs. WTF.
Anyway, I can't change what's been done. I can only move forward. Again.
Today is a new day. All the carbs in the house are gone. Again. I know, because I consumed them. HA.
The back is feeling better for the most part. I am icing it at night and I notice only when I am stressed and rushing around does it act up.
Went to CrueFest last Saturday. WOW. Really...entertaining and somewhat bizarre. I witnessed such human depravity I cannot even begin to blog about it. What a riot to be an observer to all that. Not exactly my scene, but I went to see Sixx AM because the book and music inspired me. Lotta respect for Nikki Sixx but I'm gonna leave the Crue music to the drunken men who oogled every female they could and the um slightly trashy women that encouraged the oogling. However, I will say that the lead singer for Buck Cherry is damn hot and knows how to strut his stuff.
Tomorrow I return to the gym after 3 weeks away from any form of cardio. My old friend TREADMILL and I have a lot of talking to do.
In the self awareness department, I have realized that I tie a food ritual to a favorite TV event. Bad to do, but good to realize.
I did it with the Sopranos and now I see myself doing it with Mad Men and just about any baseball game I watch on TV. I want pizza or I want a burger. It is strange. Like I get all excited for food when instead I should just consider the show or the game the event to be excited about.
Well, carbs are out. Protein and exercise are in. Let's see if I can get the scale going in the right direction again. I may, just may, have a sex romp weekend in October for a reward.
Yes, your eyes fell out of your head, I know. Don't look at me like that! I never said this was a PG-rated blog. I'm 38 and peaking by the day! I am the equivalent of an 18 year old boy! Just call me Samantha Jones.
And just with whom is this potential romp? We've been chatting online for about a month and I affectionately call him Seattle. Yup. I sure know how to pick'em far away, don't I? I tell myself it's better that way. LOL And in case you're wondering, yes he does know what I look like. The wonders of the web cameras never cease to amaze me. Technology can give us the impression that we're closer than we are, with just a few mere pixels of images. Anyway, Seattle is 30 years old, blonde, and tall. And incredibly into me in that odd "is this for real" way. Like call me up late at night just to hear my voice. Send me text messages just to say he was thinking about me. And little lustful phrases that make me shiver. He's quite the sexy guy who claims he's just being himself, not putting on an act to seduce a woman. Not that I'd mind the effort.
This phenomenon is mostly due, I believe, to the fact that there's a great mystique about being far away which is why a weekend is all that's possible. But if he's going to follow through like he says he is, I'll take it. If not, no harm. We'll see if he actually buys the plane ticket out here!
As for the local dating scene, not much is going on at all! Certainly not on Chemistry - what a waste of money! Got a few "hey I'm interested in you" notices but the guys are more than 3 hours away. What's up with that? AND I said I was interested back to them, just for the hell of it, and got nothing in return. Too damn funny people. What are they waiting for? Anyway, I've done the serious "I'm so in love with you it hurts long distance relationship," way too many times. NOT going there again.
I know we cannot plan who we fall for, but I'm at least going to try to keep it in the same state.
Say it with me now, "Ummmm Hmmmmm."
Losing Weight; Finding Men
"Never make someone a priority in your life when you are just their option."